Pop yer cork!

Sooo, I've been keeping this blog now for nearly 3 YEARS. Gulp. That's a long time, especially in dog years, to be unsuccessfully practicing something without getting any better at it. But, since I don't have any other anniversaries to celebrate, unless you count the anniversary of that time I got really sick in grad school and gave myself an asthmatic condition and fainted in the bathroom and fell on my face and gave myself a black eye.  I'm not sure how exactly to commemorate that without a historical re-enactment which would be totally inaccurate because I'm wearing my hair completely differently these days, and I'm not really one for wigs (disclaimer: actually, I'm totally one for wigs). Anyway, I think that happened in November, so there is still time to plan. In the meantime, let's commemorate the anniversary of this here goddamn blog. Champagne anyone?

In honor of this solemn occasion I've decided to re-release my top 12 blog entries (in terms of readership*) of all times (with new commentary...probably). There are so many new readers and so many old readers who probably just want to remember the good times with me, I think it could be a fun exercise.

*Disclaimer: this "top readership" thing is sort of a lie. A few months ago I "hid" most of the Ken entries because it made me physically ill and full of white, hot rage every time I saw them referenced in my blog stats. When I looked at the tallied scores of all my posts last night, almost all of the Ken entries had made the top ten. Such a douche, and yet, so popular. That seems about right. Because this is my blog, I'm going to play by my rules, which includes not including anything about Ken. Except for this sponsored message from my friend Merrick: "Dear Ken, eat a bag of dicks." Onward! Ho!