I like to just flow (Jackson)

Dearest Joce,
Well, if you've gotten this letter I'm out of town by now. Last nite, I know that I irritated you by flaking out, but I had to. I apologize deeply. There is a main thing in my life that allows me to not limit myself to one crowd of people. Now I don't know whether that makes me a flake or open minded, but when I'm doing something I like to just flow. That meant that I was just going with what was going on, and obviously that interfered with calling you. The basic thing is, I care about you deeply and I don't want to be rude or unfair to you; I also hope that you can read my handwriting since it's lessened in legibility over the past months. I hope that you're not extremely bitter and I'll write in the months to come.